Columnists
Sunday, May 31, 2026 · Live Oak
Why Your Affirmations Keep Failing (And What Actually Works)
You've been doing affirmations wrong. Here's the one small shift that makes them stick instead of bounce off your brain like a rubber ball.
Homeowners' Associations: Where Democracy Goes to Die (And Takes Your Mailbox With It)
A retiree got fined for his lawn ornament. The ornament was a flamingo. The flamingo was also his late wife's ashes.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Welder Who Fixed What Insurance Companies Wanted to Forget
A metalworker in Michigan spent three years rebuilding wheelchairs for strangers—for free—because the repair industry was basically dead.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The State Park Nobody Knows About (That's 45 Minutes From Everywhere)
Every region has one—a state park so thoroughly overlooked that the parking lot has actual empty spaces. Here's how to find it and why you should go this weekend.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
Cast Iron Needs Your Respect, Not Your Seasoning Spray
That bottle of cast iron seasoning spray is a waste of money. Here's what actually builds a pan that cooks like it's been in your family for three generations.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Split Squat Is Better Than You Think (And Probably Wrong)
Most people do split squats like they're afraid of committing to either leg. Here's why that's costing you strength and why the fix takes 30 seconds to understand.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
How to Cut Your First Dovetails with a $15 Saw and Stop Apologizing for Them
Dovetails aren't magic—they're geometry and muscle memory. Here's how to cut joints that actually fit without dropping $200 on a saw.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Nostalgia Industrial Complex Is Selling Us the Same Party Three Times Over, and We Keep Buying Tickets
Every festival this summer looks identical—and that's not an accident. We're experiencing the most aggressively mediocre concert season in modern history, and honestly? I'm tired.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Brutalist's Threequel Problem: Why We're Addicted to Movies That Don't Know When to Stop
Brady Corbet's "The Brutalist" is a masterpiece trapped in a 215-minute hostage situation. Here's why epic runtime has become the new participation trophy.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Great Squirrel Uprising and Other Things People Have Gone to Court Over
A man sued his own dog. A woman's legal battle with a squirrel lasted years. And somewhere, someone is still mad about a potato. Welcome to the American justice system.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Cult of Productivity Theater Is Eating Itself, and I'm Here for the Collapse
Everyone's suddenly admitting they use their fancy planner as a decorative object. The great productivity-industrial complex is finally breaking, and honestly? It's the most productive thing anyone's done all year.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Oscars Made Us Watch a Three-Hour Hostage Situation and Called It Entertainment
Every year we pretend the Academy Awards matter while secretly hoping someone will do something truly unhinged. This year, nobody did, and that was the real catastrophe.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Dangerous Beauty of Unfinished Sentences—Why Collingwood's Philosophy Still Matters
A 20th-century British philosopher figured out what every writer, thinker, and person in an argument needs to know: the moment you think you're done thinking, you've already lost.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Fed's Rate Cut Kabuki Has a Real Victim—Anyone With a Savings Account
The Federal Reserve cuts rates this week while pretending it's good news. It isn't, and savers know it.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
Why Rereading a Poem You Hated in High School Might Actually Save You Today
That dusty anthology on your shelf isn't full of dead words—it's full of people who figured out something you need to know right now.
Sunday, May 31, 2026
The Thing About Affirmations Nobody Tells You: They Work Better When They're Specific to Your Actual Life
Most affirmations fail because they're too vague to believe. Here's how to write ones that actually stick—and why your brain will thank you for it.
Sunday, May 31, 2026